To the Woman who crossed the street this morning,
I am sorry I sat on my horn at you this morning. I am sorry that I stopped the car and put my head out the window and yelled at you for moving like a float and not paying attention to the driver's on the road who are trying to get to work. You see, I did this for your own good. I was merely trying to teach you a lesson. Take this letter as a lesson of life. When you cross the street randomly, it scares the drivers on that road. For one, he has to stand on his brakes in fear of turning you into a bird; which if you were struck at the speed I was going, might have sent you to the hospital, or the burial ground, which then in turn would send my ass to jail or they would suspend my license and get fined and go to jail eventually.
Do you know what happens when I suddenly brake? When I brake, the other cars behind me have to brake. Imagine if the driver in the car behind me wasn't paying attention. Say he/she were changing the CD or the radio station. Say if the child in that car yelled out for mommy and daddy cause the baby smelled bad and did poo-pi in her/his pants. Do you know what happens to that car and that poo-pi'd baby? They end up in my back seat through the rear window. Can you live with that? Jeopardizing our lives because you couldn't wait for me to drive pass; because you couldn't wait for the light to turn red or even wait till the walking man flashes; because you couldn't cross at a normal cross path. Because of you, potentially three people could have been sent to the hospital this morning, or worse, could have been killed.
Also, because of you, I wasted so much gas in order to have my vehicle stop in time so I wouldn't run your pathetic McDonald billboard ass over; you walking speed bump. Do you even know how much gas costs these days? Yest, its not as expensive as it was last summer, but still $2.59~$2.69 per gallon still makes a dent in the wallet. If you were going to cross without notice, then the least you can do is pay for a gallon of gas. Mail it to me, or send me a voucher I don't care, just don't flip me off when I saved your life because your brain couldn't function with all that Soul Glow you decided to shower with.
So you see, don't take my yelling to the heart. I was merely telling you that I was paying attention. If it were any other driver, he/she would have ran you over in a heartbeat. And especially these days with all these senior citizens playing Grand Theft Auto - Bean Town Rumble style...you might be kissing the cement right now. So next time, don't cross without looking both ways. Try to be a good role model. Try to value your life more.
~Yours Truly
The Man who saved your life.
Ponder this: Smile Often!
I am sorry I sat on my horn at you this morning. I am sorry that I stopped the car and put my head out the window and yelled at you for moving like a float and not paying attention to the driver's on the road who are trying to get to work. You see, I did this for your own good. I was merely trying to teach you a lesson. Take this letter as a lesson of life. When you cross the street randomly, it scares the drivers on that road. For one, he has to stand on his brakes in fear of turning you into a bird; which if you were struck at the speed I was going, might have sent you to the hospital, or the burial ground, which then in turn would send my ass to jail or they would suspend my license and get fined and go to jail eventually.
Do you know what happens when I suddenly brake? When I brake, the other cars behind me have to brake. Imagine if the driver in the car behind me wasn't paying attention. Say he/she were changing the CD or the radio station. Say if the child in that car yelled out for mommy and daddy cause the baby smelled bad and did poo-pi in her/his pants. Do you know what happens to that car and that poo-pi'd baby? They end up in my back seat through the rear window. Can you live with that? Jeopardizing our lives because you couldn't wait for me to drive pass; because you couldn't wait for the light to turn red or even wait till the walking man flashes; because you couldn't cross at a normal cross path. Because of you, potentially three people could have been sent to the hospital this morning, or worse, could have been killed.
Also, because of you, I wasted so much gas in order to have my vehicle stop in time so I wouldn't run your pathetic McDonald billboard ass over; you walking speed bump. Do you even know how much gas costs these days? Yest, its not as expensive as it was last summer, but still $2.59~$2.69 per gallon still makes a dent in the wallet. If you were going to cross without notice, then the least you can do is pay for a gallon of gas. Mail it to me, or send me a voucher I don't care, just don't flip me off when I saved your life because your brain couldn't function with all that Soul Glow you decided to shower with.
So you see, don't take my yelling to the heart. I was merely telling you that I was paying attention. If it were any other driver, he/she would have ran you over in a heartbeat. And especially these days with all these senior citizens playing Grand Theft Auto - Bean Town Rumble style...you might be kissing the cement right now. So next time, don't cross without looking both ways. Try to be a good role model. Try to value your life more.
~Yours Truly
The Man who saved your life.
Ponder this: Smile Often!
